March 15, 2020 (The Ides of March)

Being of a certain vintage, I am of a generation when all you needed to do when meeting another individual was to give them a nice, firm handshake. You could size someone up by how they shook hands. There was the aggressive, overachiever, whose only goal was to reduce you to submission with a handshake worthy of Thor. On the other end of the spectrum was the squishy fishy that felt just like that. Regardless, we were all on the same page.

As it turned out, that wasn’t enough for Gen X’ers and Millenials. They needed more ways to show faux affection. We evolved through the two hand clasp, the shake and arm touch, the shake and shoulder pat, the two arm grab, and then the full man hug with or without cheek-touching. I wonder where we go from here?

And now we know. The coronavirus has changed everything, and, I might say, for the better. Handshakes, except for the President, are verboten. We can do the single elbow touch, the double elbow touch, or, preferably, nothing at all. We will no longer have to watch those awkward moments on TV talk shows when the guest comes out, and the guest and the host cannot decide which is the appropriate greeting. Now, they can just wave at each other.

We are all looking for a return to normalcy. I am looking forward to the return of the handshake.

February 29, 2020

“All we have to fear is fever itself.”

January 19, 2020

I interview high school seniors for college. I have found that the overwhelming majority of them want to concentrate in the STEM sciences in college with a specific interest in artificial intelligence and robotics. To better prepare myself for these interviews, I read a book on artificial intelligence titled “AI Superpowers” by Kai-Fu Lee. It is synopsis of the history of AI, the battle for dominance between the US and China, and where we are going from here. It was all well and good until I realized that most of the jobs I have held in my youth and adult life could be replaced by algorithms and robots.

One of my first jobs was as a caddie where I would lug two ridiculously heavy golf bags over 18 holes. $6 was a great day. I wasn’t expected to pick clubs or read putts. I was expected to keep up, shut up, and find errant golf balls. Today, this is a perfect job for a robot. The robot could be programmed to give yardage. Through AI, it could “learn” a player’s game, and suggest clubs. With laser technology, it could read putts. Unfortunately, players would still have to tend their own flagsticks, I think.

One summer in high school, I was hired by a trucking company to manually pile 75 pound crates of frozen meet onto palettes. It was great exercise, but I am quite sure it is a job that has already been automated. A robot could certainly do the job faster and better, and would not require a lunch hour and a nap.

Before college, I worked in the shipping room of a local tool manufacturer. I would collect already made tools, and prepare them for packing and shipping. It was somewhat mindless, and another job that should be replaced. Robots don’t join unions.

After college, I drove a taxi to make ends meet. Driverless cars and cabs will soon make that occupation obsolete. Driverless Ubers will cruise the streets and airports looking for fares, and probably do it more safely and efficiently than our current crop of drivers.

Prior to graduate school, I worked as a waiter in Charlottesville, VA. Restaurants are trying to automate the service component as much as possible. We are already inputting our own orders into iPads. There are already robo-bartenders. Who else can remember all the new exotic drink recipes?

I also worked at this time as a monitor in the coronary care unit of the University of Virginia hospital. My job was to stare at a bank of screens, and alert the nursing staff when one of the critically-ill patients developed an emergency. I for one would be a lot more comfortable if a machine and not someone like me was doing this job. Machines don’t lose focus, and go crazy from boredom.

For a period of time, I was a placement counselor in NYC. I matched job applicants with jobs. There are now several websites that do this cheaper, faster, and better.

I spent most of my professional career in the financial services business as an advisor and manager. For the majority of investors, most firms have robo advisor platforms where the customers fill out an online form, and then receive an asset allocation recommendation. Customers get automatic rebalancing, lower fees, and don’t have to talk to someone like me.

Fortunately, not all of my former jobs have been automated, or may never be automated. It is hard to find a robot to clean bathrooms, flip hamburgers, chaperone alumni children, transport patients and cadavers around a hospital, give blood, or volunteer as a human guinea pig. Thank goodness. After all, isn’t that what makes humans special?