Kenosha

September 1, 2020

Donald Trump probably couldn’t find Kenosha on a map even if you spotted him the “W” and the “I.” And who could blame him? Kenosha is a city with a population of under 100,000. It is located somewhere between two real cities, Chicago and Milwaukee. To put Kenosha in perspective, the population of the United States is close to 330,000,000. Kenosha represents 3 ten thousandths of a percent of our entire population, yet we are supposed to believe that as Kenosha goes, so goes the United States. Oooh, I’m scared.

The only person who appears to be scared is the Scaredy-cat-in-Chief. He was speechless when he had the opportunity to confront Putin about Russian interference, BountyGate, and more. The reality TV Star, who made “You’re fired” his catchphrase, is famously afraid to fire people. He is a germaphobe. He is scared of wearing a mask. He is afraid of what wind and rain might due to his hair. He was too afraid to serve his country. He is afraid to release his tax returns. He is afraid of mail-in ballots. He is afraid to release his medical results.

Americans are not afraid that Kenosha might come to their neighborhoods because Kenosha is a blip in the scheme of things. A few people doing crazy stuff is not ideal, but no one feels threatened and thinks they are coming to take the suburbs except Donald Trump.